The Incredibles - 2004

Rated - PG
115 min.

How did you ever miss this one!?
Seriously, this is one of Pixar's best, by far! (personally Wall-e is my favorite, but all the same, This is their best all around!)
Oh well, let's pretend like you have been trapped in a swedish prision cell for 10 years and you need to make up for lost time. So what makes this movie... (excuse the pun) so INCREDIBLE?! let me tell you!
So you like superheroes, but wondered how the "real" world would deal with them... lawsuits and destruction of buildings and what not... well they would go into a witness protection program and hang up the old cape. These heroes have done just that. On top of that, they have tried to take up normal jobs, but then heroes start dissapearing! Someone is hunting them down!
Who could it be faithful reader!? watch to find out more. This movie is just a joy and if you were in that swedish prision and have just been released due to the false charges of money laundering being dropped, then snag this one up. You'll love it, no doubt about it!
"Behold, the Underminer! I'm always beneath you, but nothing is beneath me! I hereby declare war on peace and happiness! Soon, all will tremble before me!"

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OWN IT

Up - 2009

Rated - PG
98 min.

Yet again, Pixar delivers. I keep expecting them to slip up somewhere, but they just don't. The movie revolves around an old man who has lost his wife and has decided to stay locked away from society. When a construction crew plans on kicking him out of his home he sets flight. The house flying on a billion balloons wafts through adventure. Think, around the world in 80 days meets Gullivers Travels. All he and his wife ever wanted was adventure, and he has found it! With the help of Kevin the female pehistoric bird, Dug the dog and a helpful boy scout they find themselves in a wild land of adventure!
The animation is beautiful! No, beyond beautiful. Each Pixar film seems to tackle one main fasset of their filming. Wall-e was the camera. With Up, it would seem to me that they were headed for texturing. Some of the close ups are simply astounding of how realistic the fabrics look. Yet somehow they retain their cartoon-ish feel.
Definatly go see this movie. The film is geared more towards adults which makes it all the better. and unlike Dreamworks, where adult means shit humor, with Pixar adult means heavy topics which children can still enjoy. Warning, (in all seriousness) you might tear up a bit in the beginning, if you're bringing a date, grab some kleenex! On the other hand, if you are with a girlfriend and have no intentions for commitment, probably avoid this movie, she'll be talking about marrige the whole ride home. Good hunting movie lovers!
"My master made me this collar. He is a good and smart master and he made me this collar so that I may speak. Squirrel! "

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OWN IT

The Great Dictator - 1940

Rated - G
125 min.

Banned in Germany, Ireland, Spain (I'm sure there's more, but those are the only ones I know for sure.) This is a brilliant movie. Anyone who's ever learned about Nazi Germany should be forced to view it. As far as I am concerned there are only three WW2 movies: All quiet... , Stalag 17 and the Great Dictator. But enough about me and my love of zee nazi flick. This movie is a spoof of Hitler's germany, as well as Hitler's rise to power. But of course Charlie Chaplin's humor is steeped throughout the film. The slap stick and wize quips. All of which combine into, what I believe is his finest work.
Sadly, in Charlie's time, this movie got horrible reviews, mainly due to the "too soon?" effect. (notice the date it was released... 1940. pearl harbor was on Dec. 7th 1941...) But the film has legs. It's longevity will pass down from generation to generation. It's immortality wil help remind us of the horrors commited by the Nazi's, remind us to never repeat that past and... as always... to laugh.
Instead of hunting down for a trailer of The Great Dictator, I've posted the ending monolouge. It could possibly be one of the greatest endings that I have ever seen. Please take the time, and enjoy it.
"We've just discovered the most wonderful, the most marvelous poisinous gas. It will kill everybody. "

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OWN IT

Watching the Detectives - 2007

Rated - unrated
91 min.

This was one of those hidden gems you stumble across the movie rental store on accident. This one reminded me of a much more romantic comedy in the vein of "Be Kind Rewind." But honestly, where "Be Kind..." failed, this movie provides. Why no one else has seen it yet, I'll never know. The movie is basically this, Main character owns a movie rental store, he has a hard time keeping girlfriends because he lives for movies. Then enter female intrest, she helps keep main character involved in "real" life, by making it more interesting, or in other words, more like a movie. He beings "liveing the movies he loves". It truley is a gem, and you shouldn't miss it. Go run down to blockbuster (before the go bankrupt.) or put it on your netflix. It's sure to impress!

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OWN IT

Nocturna - 2007

Rated - G
80 min.

This spanish animated film is very, very DeToro, aside from the fact that he had nothing to do with it. The animation and character design is a wonderful mix of more modern "flash" styles with the talent of a past Disney film. The characters glide across the screen, zipping through the wonderfully painted backgrounds. What else is there to say... OH YEAH! the plot!?
again, the DelToro feel is unmistakable. The plot revolves around a child who stays up too late and finds out about the world of Nocturna. In the world, monsters put things back for us in the morning. Dew is gently plasced on to flowers, there are three "robots?" who's job it is, to mess up our hair at night. The main character runs into the "Cat Shepard" and mayham ensues. Definatly worth the rental, if you can find it. On top of all of that, it is in Spanish, but the Dub is perfect. So for those who worry abotu reading during a film, no worries!

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OWN IT

Star Trek - 2009

Rated - PG-13
126 min.

So once again as a precursor to my review, I hate. yes hate star trek. I am a Star Wars nerd through and through. I was looking forward to this movie, simply to mock it in this review. Unfortunatly for me, I can't. It was an awesome movie! Seriously, It truely was the Star Trek for non-trekkies. The action was sweet, the plot was thick and meaty, the acting was well done. These are aspects I would never normally associate with Star Trek, but I feel for J.J. Abrams I must. Yes the man who brought such joy into our lives with "Lost", now brings us non-fans one more thing to latch onto.
I believe he is my new hero. But to not put him an ivory tower in which he may fall, I will now rip on the movie a bit.
... The fans might be dissapointed that, in essence, this movie has NOTHING to do with any of the originals. It's more or less and alrternate reality. But it works so well!...
So there you go, that's all I have to say badly about the movie. Seriously, go see it, fan or not. Beam me up!
"I'm a doctor, not a physicist!"

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OWN IT

Lucky Number Slevin - 2006

Rated - R
109 min.

This is an amazing film, that somehow snuck under the radar. If you like Bruce Willis, Josh Harrnet and the many other number of supurb actors on top of that the wonderful noir' undertones, then go buy this movie. What did he say buy?
yes. dont even rent it first. Just go buy it. Trust me. It's prefect! Honestly one of my favorite films of all time. On Aug. 16th, I'm going to come out with "The Kozak's top 10" This will be my top ten... everything. And keep an eye open. This movie is going to be there. So go on then, go buy it!
"Charlie Chaplin once entered a Charlie Chaplin look-alike contest in Monte Carlo and came in third; that's a story."

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SEE IT!!!

Bolt - 2008

Rated - PG
96 min

I liked this movie alot more than I thought that I would. Don't get me wrong, It's exactly what you think it is, the plot if fun but nothing to brag about. But the character design, texturing, and character development is miles above what I was thinking it would be. Rhino the hamster and Mittens the cat are supurb! With their cynical and overly hyper additudes you'll be laughing the whole time. At this point it's been out of the theater long enough to come on to DVD. I would def. suggest the rental. The only thing that struck me as a fault of the film was Hanna Montana as the voice actress for Penny (main girl.) Not that I'm against her personally, she's just not a good voice actress, very flat dialouge. That and I'm mainly against using big name actors in animated features just because you want the parents to come out. Use professional voice actors! they exist for a reason!
"I'll go get my ball..."

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OWN IT

Monsters vs. Aliens - 2009

Rated - PG
94 min.

First you must know that I am not a huge fan of Dreamworks. Shrek was cute, but really... I just don't see who it's any where near as good as... ANY Disney or Pixar film. Not even the same ball game. So when I say that if UP doesn't live up to the hype that I've placed before it (don't worry it will.) But... if it doesn't... This movie Should TOTALLY WIN THE OSCAR!!!
It's awesome. now that is to say I'm curious if that's because I'm a nerd and have seen WAY to many B-movies, or if that's because I'm an animator and love that 3D is finally using squash and stretch. But at any rate, go rent / see this flick. you wont be let down, and if you are then go watch Shrek again you HACK!
"I'll see you guys at lunch... "


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OWN IT

Castle Crashers - 2008

COMING SOON

Soul Calibur IV

A tale of souls and swords eternally retold. That has been the story of the Soul Blade series since the start. But after a the single console Playstation 2 flop that was Soul Calibur III, Soul Calibur IV had to be the best in the series to bring the fans back to the golden days of Soul Calibur II and Soul Calibur. Have I said Soul Calibur and numbers enough to confuse you yet. I hope so.

Soul Calibur has been a long running series since the Playstation days…yes there was a time before the PS2 for all of you young’uns out there, and the newest title brought a needed step back to its roots. Soul Calibur IV controls a lot like SCII and that is the best thing about it. Soul Calibur II, in my opinion, is the best 3D fighting game that has been released. Everything flows nicely and the hit detection is very good. They also have added a finisher move for every character. They stole the one great thing left about Mortal Kombat.

The story revolves around the would be final battle between the wielders of the Soul Edge and Soul Calibur, Nightmare and Sigfried respectively. The normal cast of characters intertwines into the story posing numerous different story threads and outcomes. The story mode itself probably could stand to be a little bit longer though. Each character plays through five stages where they fight multiple enemies and at the end, a CG cut scene wraps up the potential ending. I am kind of torn. Though for the general story, it could be longer, but as a gamer with not as much time on his hands as he once had, its kind of nice. I can play through a story in about twenty minutes and satisfy the twitch I get when I’ve neglected my 360 for a few days.

This edition also sees the inclusion of new characters and a bigger selection for the create a character. The inclusion of Hilde is a good choice. Its kind of nice not to see a woman who could actually submerge herself in water. Sigh…

For all of you Star Wars kids out there, I’m gonna need you guys to make sure that your retainers are in tight and close the bag of Doritos so they don’t spill everywhere…

I don’t think that the inclusion of Yoda, Darth Vader, and Starkiller was needed or can be justified by anyone story wise or game play wise. This was just a pathetic attempt to gain a fan base that was most likely already buying the product. Also the two character that I have been able to play, Yoda and Starkiller, are broken. Starkiller had to many unblockable moves and Yoda is about 2 feet tall thus making him impossible to hit or grab.

The online play is a much needed addition to the series. You can take either your created character or one of the many story characters. You can also start a room where the winner stays fighting until he is knocked off of his throne.

If you a big fighting game buff and you haven’t gotten this yet, for shame. For the rest of you, the game is a solid fighter that would drive the competition between any group of friends to the brink of actual fighting.

This game is rated T for Teen and is available for the Playstation 3 and Xbox 360.

Leon the Professional - 1994

This is, to say the least, (excluding Star Wars) my favorite movie of all times. Now, I understand that this is a new blog/review site. So, perhaps you don't even know who I am, and are saying to yourself... "What does this kid know! He's never seen obscure movies like Robot Monster, The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari, 8 1/2, or The Street of Crocodiles. All of which I have seen, and you may have imagined existed. Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to undermine you, this site is to promote your movie library, But when I say Favorite Movie. It means something. The Professional, or as it is know in the foreign version, Leon, is director Luc Besson's greatest work (in my non-professional opinion.) Luc is the genius that brought you The Fifth Element, La Femme Nikita, The Transporter series and Arthur and the Invisibles... well they can't all be great.

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So then, now that you know the Director, let me introduce you to the actors. Leon, played by Jean Reno is a "cleaner", a hitman. He lives a solitary life until he comes across a curious young girl named Mathilda, played by Natalie Portman. When Mathilda's father is killed by a bad cop named Stansfield played by Gary Oldman, Leon and Mathilda's lives become intertwined. Mathilda then wants revenge for her little brother which she asks Leon to teach her to be a cleaner. Her revenge becomes her downfall and Leon must move in for the kill.

Jean Reno can do no wrong in my mind, and Gary Oldman is amazing in anything her touches. Oldman is truly one of this generations great actors, right up there with Daniel Day Lewis. Natalie Portman, who can normally can't act her way out of a paperbag, does the proformance of her life, and only at the tender age of 13. (sorry Natalie, but really you're just not all that good, but I do love you in V for vendetta, and you're simply a beautiful woman.) Anyway, The action/crime drama/tragedy/thriller or whatever genre you can think to put it in is going to be at the top of that list. It's just wonderful.

(Rated-R 110 min.)

Tropic Thunder - 2008

What kind of movie would you expect to see if I handed you a movie staring a washed up hack, former drunken druggie and a slightly over rated actor. Well I don't know what movie you're thinking about cause it sure as hell isn't Tropic Thunder. Directed by Ben Stiller, which could be a good thing or bad thing depending on which of his movies you've seen. The movie also stars Jack Black and Robert "I'm in every movie in 2008" Downey Jr. Both of which bring so much to the proverbial table I still can't quite believe it. If you haven't seen the movie yet, and you're pretty sure you still have a funny bone go see the movie right now, before you read the rest of this review... Then come back and read the review, cause otherwise why would i write it?

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O.K. so now that you've seen the movie, aren't you so happy I told you to? I know you are. Anyway, The movie focuses on Tugg Speedman, Kirk Lazarus and Jeff Portnoy. Stiller, Downey Jr and Black respectively. All of these actors are looking to expand their acting careers with the new movie Tropic Thunder, a film based on the "real life" accounts of "Four Leaf" Tayback, Nick Nolte. As the movie filming begins to bomb, "Four Leaf" Tayback suggests to the movies director, Damien Cockburn played by Steve Coogan, that they film "guerrilla style" in the jungle to give the actors and the film a much more realistic feel. From that point on you wont stop laughing. I don't want to blow anything of the plot in this review though, honestly just go and see it.For those of you who are reading this with out listening to my prior mentioning of seeing the movie first, make sure to get to the theater early! There are fake movie trailers to start of the feel for the movie. Defiantly don't miss those!
Ben Stiller's character is only known for a series of lame action films, not to mention is oscar attempt entitled "Simple Jack", where he went "full retard". Robert Downey Jr's character, Kirk Lazarus is known for all his movies being blatant oscar nods. Jack Black's character is a rip on famous comedians from the past 10 years, mostly Eddie Murphy, where all his movies are played by himself and the plots revolve around fart jokes. But the best role in the whole film is by far Tom Cruise's. Yes that's right, Tom "I'm coo coo for cocoa puffs" Cruise. He plays Les Grossman, a fat, hairy, jew with a love for hip hop music. His constant swearing and over the top acting blows off the screen and straight into your heart. I know, I know.... Tom Cruise + in to your heart = paradox. But it's true. So go, go right now and see this movie! Do it!... what are you doing still reading this? GO!

(Rated-R . 107 min.)

Brick - 2005

Written and Directed by Rian Johnson, a relative new comer to the film industry, and yet this, his second film on record is already easily one of my 20 favorite films of all time. The acting, the cinematography, the direction and the glorious writing. The overall feeling of the film could best be described as a high school drug dealing 1940's detective drama set in modern day with just a hint of comedy. (and yes, that's the "best" way to describe it.)

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The movie follows Brendan Frye, a teenager who becomes obsessed with finding his ex-girlfriend, Emily, when she mysteriously disappears. After following some leads Brendan meets up with the local gang leader, The Pin, and his henchman, Tug. Enter the fem fatal, Laura. She offers twists and turns into the plot that no one could see coming. The ending falls on Brendan to figure out which gang/click in the school would have the infor

mation to rescue Emily and find 

where the Pin's missing brick went off to.

The over arching feeling for this whole film is something from a bygone era of quips and retorts. Personally, I miss those times. Where writing a good story was more important than how much the special effects budget was. Joseph Gordon-Levitt (3rd rock from the sun, the lookout) plays Brendan, his acting is slick and classy. At some point this kid must have devoured the heart of a great actor in order to consume there unholy acting ability. Either that or he took ALOT of acting lessons, because since Brick his talent has risen through the roof. Not to mention the other actors in the film that do an awesome justice to the script. On a personal side note, I'm not one to swoon over actresses, but man oh man! Nora Zehetner is defiantly fitting of the modern fem fatal role. All in all, rent this movie tonight if you haven't already had the privilege to see it. If you have seen it then I'm sure you already own it.

(Rated-R . 110 min.)

River City Ransom - 1989

From the unorthodox union of Double Dragon Style beat’em ups and RPG shops and sats comes one of the most unique and downright fun games of all time. In the quaint mini metropolis of River City, the kids are not alright. It seems the local gangs have all been brought under one banner. They’ve taken control of the local High School and from there other parts of the city. But Slick, the ringleader, crosses the line when he kidnaps Cyndi, as this causes her boyfriend Ryan and his best pal Alex to step into action.

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The most unique thing about the game is how Ryan and Alex start out just barely able to hold their own but grow into gang busting machines. This done by going to the local shops scattered around town and eating food to increase stats, reading books to learn new techniques, and relaxing in a questionably run spa. You gain the money to buy all these helpful items by beating the lunch money out of the gang members running amok around the city. As you progress you’ll need to take down the leaders of the various areas and then take out Slick’s lieutenants. When you’ve trained up enough you can then go and take down the big man himself, save the city, and get the girl.

A great multiplayer game with surprising depth for an old 8-bit game, River City Ransom is game you shouldn’t pass up.
(Available on the NES, Wii Virtual Console, Rated E+10 and on the Game Boy Advanced as River City Ransom Ex, Rated Teen)

Batman: the Dark Knight - 2008

At first glance and a thought of the past, Batman in cinema is like anything sharp and spiny up one’s rectum. The mass amount of crap that encompasses the previous Batman movies, games, and television make a person very gun shy. The rubber suit with the nipples alone makes a guy want to start doing something productive with Sundays rather than waking up and watching cartoons. But with the release of Batman Begins, it makes one want to take up there fire arm and start firing up in the air wildly like you’re a Warner Bros. cartoon. Now its three years later and the long awaited sequel to the best non-comic book Batman production finally is out for the masses…and is taking box office records like Michael Phelps takes names in the pool.

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The movie shows the beginning of the sophomore year of the Dark Knight, and Bruce Wayne (Christian Bale) has managed to motivate the people of Gotham with his actions so much that they’re taking to the streets to help in the cause. On the opposite end of the spectrum, we see the crime families slowly starting to lose their grasp on the underworld of Gotham to the freaks. One freak in particular, The Joker (Heath Ledger), leads the sadistic charge to give the city the type of criminal that they can be proud of. In response the new District Attorney, Harvey Dent (Aaron Eckhart), vows to clean up the streets and make a world where Batman is not needed, but when the pressure of the job starts to get to the D.A., Big Bad Harv starts to show his face.

So I sat there at midnight in front of the IMAX waiting for my film to start when this reviewer’s favorite part of the movie started, The Previews. Now I don’t really talk about previews in my reviews because it typically does not have any bearing on how I view a film…but when the DC Comics symbol flashed across the screen, all my hair stood on end and I could barely hold back from shouting. The guys sitting next to us thought it was the Flash, we knew better. It was The Watchman. If you have yet to see the trailer, http://www.apple.com/trailers/wb/watchmen/, now there are no excuses. This was the perfect primer for what turned out to be the best summer movie.

The Dark Knight catered to all the audiences. Everyone one from the palest comic book geek to the illiterate jock who wouldn’t be caught dead leafing through a trade paperback. There was action, drama, comedy, tragedy, a little bit of everything for everyone. It managed to capture the dark tone that the comics have and was still able to have someone who has never even heard of Batman a nice insight into the legacy that the series is.

The acting was top notch in this one. Heath Ledger definitely went out with the performance of a lifetime. He portrayed the Joker in a way that made you fear any man with a painted face for at least a week. The Joker is a sick sadistic tortured soul whose only goal in life is to make Batman’s life a living hell, and Heath brought that to a whole new level. If he does not win an Oscar for at least Best Supporting Actor, I will be very disappointed. Christian Bale brings in another vocal chord snapping performance. He manages to make his voice change to what would be a demons voice. Gary Oldman, Aaron Eckhart, Maggie Gyllenhall, and Morgan Freeman all bring in solid performances.

When it comes to Batman, or anything comics for that matter, the action has to be top notch as well as story. The fight scenes and chases are some of the best I have seen on the big screen. My favorite scene though involves The Joker, a mobster, a pencil, and a vanishing trick that Criss Angel himself would not attempt.

From top to bottom, this film is the best thing to come out in a very long time. From actors to production, this film is far and beyond the best film, I have seen this year, and will be the best one you will see to.
 A great story coupled with wonderful acting and action. Nothing can be better. Taaaa Daaaa!

(Rated PG-13 . 152 min.)